11 Signs That Your Boyfriend is Too Self-Centered
And while this person who is self centred may not be in a relationship with another person, travelling or fresh out of a previous relationship, they are still not . If you're already well into a relationship with such a person, you have no trouble recognizing self-centeredness. But is it possible to see it. That doesn't necessarily mean they're selfish all the time love to better suit your vision), but that you're trying to strengthen your relationship. needs to pour attention and energy into a self-absorbed person isn't virtuous.
People who are obsessively into themselves have an easy time making friends at first. They can be charming, interesting, and fun to be around.
But often they just want to benefit from the relationship in some way, mainly to have an audience to reinforce their relentless need for attention and approval.
You may notice your new lover has a crowd of adoring sycophants who buzz around him or her, trying to capture some of the magnetism and success. Over time, however, you see how friends are carelessly discarded by your partner, or how they drop away as they realize they are being used. One characteristic of a self-absorbed person is they don't have deep and lasting friendships based on mutual respect and trust.
They have very little empathy for others. Self-centered people think the world revolves around them and that their own challenges are the only ones that matter. They view your pain or problems through their own eyes and how it impacts them. Whatever hardships you are having, they've had it worse. They aren't interested in how you are impacted or what you are feeling. They don't want to be bothered with your emotional needs.
They think the world and you exists for their benefit and needs and have little concern about how others are affected 6.
They are more concerned with superficial qualities than character. Does your partner seem more interested in how you look, the kind of car you drive, or your income than he or she does in your characterinterests, and emotional needs?
11 Signs That Your Boyfriend is Too Self-Centered
Egotistical people often choose partners who will reflect well on them. I can attract this hot man who makes a lot of money and drives a Porsche. A self-consumed person is far more interested in how you look on his arm than he is in your goals and dreams or your deepest fears. If your partner is not very interested in who you are as a person, so you likely won't feel seen, appreciated, or heard in the relationship.
They are disinterested in your day. We all need to come home at the end of a long day and share our joys and frustrations with the one we love. It's important to be with someone who asks about your day and takes the time to listen to you attentively. Mutual sharing and active listening is an essential part of a healthy relationship.
If your partner is always dominating the conversation and never asks about your life, he or she is living in a one-dimensional world that doesn't include you. Your words are just background noise until she can take the floor and talk about what's really important — herself. Your bad day or the news about your promotion is quickly bypassed so the focus can turn back to your partner.
Your partner doesn't want to do activities that interest you. Compromise is required for a relationship to flourish. When two people come together with different interests and preferences, you both have to make concessions at times to accommodate the other. If your partner doesn't care about your opinion or interests, this is definitely a red flag. A self-absorbed partner feels that he or she should be the last word on how and where you spend your time. You must adopt his or her preferences and mold your life to fit your partner's interests and choices.
- Here are 13 traits of self-centered people you should watch out for:
- Post new comment
- Related Articles
You shouldn't have to accommodate your partner every single time. Your needs and wants should be equal to your partner's, and he or she should show a willingness to compromise. If you find yourself feeling regularly resentful and disregarded, it's time to face the truth about this person.
They interrupt you when you are talking. A self-centered partner likes the sound of his or her own voice more than yours. You'll be interrupted or talked over with little regard for your feelings. If you disagree with your partner, he will be quick to defend his point of view without even acknowledging what your perspective. She doesn't hesitate to correct you in front of others to support her position. Being heard and affirmed is a very important part of feeling loved and needed.
If you begin to feel emotionally and verbally sidelined, it is probably because your partner doesn't care.
24 Signs Your Spouse Is Way More Self-Centered Than They Seem
Your partner prioritizes herself ahead of your relationship. Your partner should have a team mentality when it comes to your relationship. He or she should consider everyone involved especially you when making decisions.
When you have a quality, emotionally intelligent partner, you will find that he views your happiness as important as his own. In his mind, the relationship is all about him. You need to face the truth that you and your relationship will never be a priority for this person, and you will never feel deeply loved and cherished.
They set a lot of rules. People who traits of self-absorption have high expectations of others. If you fall short of these expectations, you are likely to be judged and corrected very quickly.
To help you meet their expectations, people who are self-centered make rules for their partner to follow so they can feel more in control.
This is how we do dinner. This is the time we go out. This is the way we keep our house. This is how we raise the children. Often, these rules are unfair, one-sided, and unnecessary, and they make you feel resentful and disrespected. For a while one may put up with this scenario, but over time, pain is going to build up.
They may even feel guilty for expecting their partner to be there for them or to actually give anything. So they could put up with this for a while and then find another person who is exactly the same. Because even though the person is different in the beginning, their behaviour could end up being the same. Patterns Here, one may come to notice that there are certain patterns to the kind of people that they are attracted to.
And how every man or woman that they meet, seems to be the same.
In the beginning it could have been all rosy and shortly after, the same experience appears. At this point, it would be normal to feel frustrated, angry and powerless.
One may come to conclude that they are a victim and have no control over the kind of person they attract and are attracted to. The Ego Mind What shows up in ones life can be in conflict with who they truly are and yet at a deeper level, the experiences and situations that one continually finds themselves in, can feel safe.
And that fact that someone can be attracted to self centred people is a clear example of this. How Did This Happen?
At a conscious level this is only leading to pain and suffering and at a deeper level it feels comfortable. This may be hard to comprehend at first, that is until one reflects on how their needs and wants were responded to as a child.
Childhood As a child, one is completely depended on their caregivers and whether they got their needs met or not, will depend on how responsive and emotionally aware they were. If ones caregivers where emotionally undeveloped in some way and emotionally unavailable, it can lead to a role reversal taking place.
So the child then comes to view their needs and wants as something to feel guilty about. So through being there for others, others should be there for them.
And through experiencing this so many times as a child, one can then come to feel uncomfortable with thier needs. Awareness For as long as one feels the same about their needs and wants, they will continue to recreate the same situations.